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Posted by / 30-Apr-2019 22:31

However, if you are to move on with your life you need to learn to trust again.Yes, be cautious but you need to take the risk of trusting again - yes you may get hurt but you are an adult now and you can deal with that - but you may not get hurt - you may find yourself a loving and caring relationship - if you don't open yourself up to trust you will never find that.Anger is another very common feeling and that anger may have been inside you for a long time.It will help to find a safe way of expressing that anger.Flashbacks are common for survivors to experience and these can be triggered off by anything which may remind you of the abuse.When you have a flashback it can seem so real that you actually can feel you are back in the past and the abuse is actually taking place.

As a child who was abused you had no choice what happened to you and were controlled by others.

Some people find it helps to write a letter to the person who abused them, saying exactly how they felt about what happened to them and how the abuse has affected their life - you do not have to send the letter (unless you want to and some survivors do and finds this helps) - you can either keep it in a drawer and take it out and read it when you find that anger is building up inside you until you are ready to get rid of that anger and throw the letter away - which means you are no longer holding on to the anger but ready to let it go and not let it affect you for the rest of your life.

Other people may find that pummelling pillows can help get out their anger, ripping up paper, taking up self defence, keep fit, dancing, and talking - letting the anger out is important.

You may find that you have difficulty in sexual relationships because this can remind you of the abuse.

Talk to your partner, if there is something which makes you feel uncomfortable talk about that, you may need to stop for a while, it may help you for your partner to remind you where you are, you are in the present, you are safe. Believe in yourself that you have the strength and ability to move forward with your life.

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As an adult you do have a choice and can choose which path you take - a path towards negativity, destroying yourself as a person, continually blaming yourself and putting yourself down - or you can choose a path towards healing and recovery - learning to like and love yourself, praise yourself, value yourself, take the blame and guilt off your shoulders, start to be positive, start to achieve what you want to achieve in life, move towards happiness, love, fulfilment.

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